Day 7 Hua Hin

Day 7 Hua Hin – Wed 29th April

Day after Andy’s Birthday……. Woke up early for breakfast as we had planned our day out for today but it turned into a magical mystery tour as we couldn’t understand a word the guy was telling us. Never mind we set off to see what he had in store for us, maybe he was just going to take us into some desolate place and mug us but there was only one way to find out. We set off just after 8am and turned up at some Buddhist statue so we could take pics and pray, I was now beginning to have thoughts that being mugged might have been a better option as to being converted to Buddhism. There was nobody there but a few hundred monkeys wandering about, they obviously had the same thoughts as me as they were crapping all over the Buddha and making a real mess of the place. I turned around to look for Angie but at this point she was back down the hill on the phone to Abermed in Aberdeen to see if her rabies shot was up to date. We decided to leave there before there were any incidents that would ruin the holiday and went to see what was next on the agenda for the day.
Next place we rolled up to was the elephant trekking centre. It was still only about 9am and we were the first ones there. Before we knew it, we were sitting on top of a 2000kg elephant called Sengal. Away we went trekking through the scrub. We had travelled for about 10mins before this thing came to an abrupt stop, a few kicks and pokes in the ear then a few words from the trainer but nothing, time for something a little more persuasive. Wondering what he was going to do now as it was getting quite comical watching him persuading this thing to move. He then jumped off and tried to push it while shouting something, not sure what it was but I’m sure if it was in the garage at Tarves I could find the same words. That’s when he did the strangest thing that made me worry even more, He actually got Angie to drive the bloody thing while being strapped in I just had to sit there and there was nothing I could do about it. Anyway I don’t know what he did but away we went. No probs as I’m sure he would just jump on and put Angie back in the correct seat and we would get on with enjoying things again. Don’t trust the Thais as he never did get back on, we didn’t crash but I’m sure you know how it feels when you’re not in control of the car so no need to say anymore. Eventually he did come to his senses and decided to throw Angie in the back to my relief things were going to be back as they should be. NO !!! It was now my turn but as I’m a bloke this should be a piece of piss. Off we set and within 5 mins I had made my mind up that I was lucky being brought up in the UK and could use vehicles rather than having to take an elephant to school every day.
Next was the elephant show. We bought a bunch of bananas to reward them after their antics (bicycle riding, basket ball, flower painting, darts). Angie tried to share the bananas out fairly and squarely but one greedy bu*ger decided to wrench the whole lot out of her hands. Angie tried her best to wrestle with it and get her bananas back but it was a losing battle – elephant Vs Angie. No contest but she tried.
Next was the snake show. No idea what happened at the beginning as being from the UK nothing can be done before first having a cup of tea, we didin’t miss much, a bit of tail pulling, head slapping then kissing a cobra. Bla bla bla im not going to bore you with it all, Angie didn’t miss a second of the show on cam corder as if anything went wrong this was going to be the greatest You Tube moment ever. The show went without a hitch so we deleted the video then sat down waiting for the crocodile show, maybe this could be our moment, no way we were not going to miss this. First he poked his finger in it’s mouth, bit boring - it came out whole, Next was going to be his whole arm, I was beginning to wonder if I could keep filming if anything went wrong but this also went without a hitch, OK all we had left was him putting his head in the crocs mouth, I already knew I would be sick if this went wrong but decided to keep the camera rolling as it could help with the police enquiries. Things were tense but all went well so that was that. No dramas.
Next stop nice beach for lunch. Two lunches & 4 beers – 250 baht (5 quid). How happy were we. Off we trundled to the next magical mystery stop.
Bloody Buddhist Temple, Jesus !!! why are they always up a hill, if this Buddha guy built these things himself he wouldn’t be half the size he was, not wanting to offend the guy we decided to oblige and go for a look, I was standing outside when he noticed Angie was in the floor praying, I don’t know but think he was asking me what she was praying for, I told him that she was praying that ever day of her holiday would be as good as this one. He just smiled and walked away thinking about where he would take us next. Angie finally finished and came out, she then admitted that she was praying that he would just take us for a beer and no more temples.
Maybe the big lad’s not that bad (Mr Buddha) as that is where he took us next, couple of beers on another beach then back to the hotel. By the time we got back we were giving it big Zzzzzz’s in the back of the pick-up and he had to wake us up. Hope we didn’t offend him but he seemed happy enough when we handed over the hard cash for his efforts. Enough wildlife, temples & beaches for one day. Tomorrow’s our last day so will be lying horizontal on the beach or by the pool to re-charge our batteries for our trip to Vietnam. Nobody said it was going to be easy.

Day 6 Hua Hin – Wed 28th April (Andy’s Birthday) for those of you who forgot,

Up early for breakfast. Andy not happy, a mosquito launched an attack on his leg, under the cover of darkness so he couldn’t sleep for itching. He’ll live but the mosquito didn’t as Andy launched a counter attack and sprayed the room with mosquito killer so it’s now laying deed on the floor for all his mates to see. Let this be a lesson to them . There’s a sign in the room saying the hotel doesn’t spray the rooms for the little buggers anymore as they have gone ‘organic’. Think they mean environmentally friendly.
Quiet day though, lounged by the pool (in the shade) but was really hot so decided to go for a swim in the sea to cool down, stupid idea as the tide was out and the sand was too hot to walk on so we got the bus into town instead and went to the shopping mall which is all air conditioned. Popped into Tesco Lotus, bought a couple of tops and then left them in a restaurant. Great. Have to go back again I suppose but we can get some food at the same time, we may even head to the Hard Rock cafe for a couple of Tigers before we turn in for the night.
Back to hotel and now away to bed, we did manage to find the bar but as you can see by the photo not quite the right spelling, decided to give it a miss as you just never know over here.

Day 5 Hua Hin

MISSED BREAKHAST, bugger. Probably due to the Thsai/Scottish bonding session the night before. Ah well. Phoned the guy who picked us up from the train station to take us into toon for brunch, he phoned back and told us he would be a bit late as he had accident – good start. He arrived a few minutes later anyway and picked us up. We arranged for him to pick us up Thursday morning to do a tour around Hua Hin. Not sure what we’re exactly going to see but the finger pointing & pictures had minky’s, elephants & temple’s in so I assume that’s what we’ll see but you’re never sure. Cost 2000 baht for us both (40 squid-ish) for the whole day which is nae three bad. I asked the guy his name and he said ‘Me?’ and I said ‘aye, you’. He said ‘My name is Me’. Ok dokey. I told him our names and he looked at us and laughed. The girls the night before laughed too – ‘Andeeee & Angeeee – ha, ha, ha’. Yeah, hilarious.
Back to the hotel with our Factor 200 for Andy’s knees but by the time we got there the clouds had arrived which was probably a blessing in disguise. Sat there ‘til six o’clock, back to room and ordered room service, couldn’t be bothered going out. Watched all the American detective soaps and had early night so we could make breakfast in the morning.
June / Jen - the red wine here is not cheap unless you want to drink vinegar. About 12 quid for a decent bottle out of the shop. I treated myself the other night in Bangkok to a glass of red with my meal which cost about six quid. The waiter poured out a couple of mouthfuls into the glass and walked away. I thought he was waiting for me to taste it before pouring in more but that was it, couldn’t believe it. I’ve never seen a glass of my wine last so long as that one. Nae happy.

Day 4 Hua Hin

Got up this morning and made it for breakfast again. Lazed by the pool, took a walk along the beach for a late lunch. One of the beach ponies decided to break loose from his thai cowboy so sat and watched the drama unfold as they all chased it up and down the beach, The pony was having none of it. He must have been thinking, you can pi*s right off, I’ve had enough of this sh*te. Don’t blame it, the poor beasties are standing on the beach all day in the baking heat and no sign of water. He gave a couple of back kicks so we were hoping it managed to drop kick one of the thai cowboys but they managed to catch him in the end. Ah well, he gave them a good run about for about half an hour.
Back to the pool for a last sun downer. Andy ‘teflon skin I don’t need no sun cream’ is now looking very much like a cross between rudolph the reindeer and barry the lobster so think he might have to spend tomorrow in the shade. It’s bloody hot but there’s a good breeze so not too bad.
Went into toon for dinner and realized Hua Hin is much bigger than we thought. Had dinner then went to the night market which is just full of sh*te and deep fried bugs. Found the smallest bar in the world though so had to have a swift one just to be sociable. Wasn’t that sociable as only me and Andy could fit round it. Had a trek round the girly bars and stopped at Scottie’s. The Thai girl who owns it came in and asked if we were from Aberdeen – fit??? How did she know that? Maybe it was the colour of our red and white skin that gave it away. Her boyfriend is from Aberdeen and works for Chevron in the North Sea. So that was it. Jaeger Bombs all round, I was just waiting for the fall out as Thai girls don’t drink but obviously this was a Thai Scottish bar so they were probably hardened drinkers, thank god. Another day gone, another blog.

Day 3 - Bangkok to Hua Hin

Got up bright 'n early for taxi to Hua Luampong train station. Hotel packed our breakfast for the train journey. Andy almost left Bangkok without me as I had jumped off the train to get a coffee not realising Andy Pandy's watch was 5 minutes slow. Anyway, I legged it through the station and managed to jump on which was a relief. Although I had the wallett I didn't fancy being stranded in Bangkok on my own. Started to tuck into our packed lunch - couple of egg sandwiches & fruit. The whole lot got the heave ho. After picking out the carrotts, peas & sweetcorn & took a bite and almost threw up. They must have spread on condensed milk instead of mayonnaise, don't try it!

Anyway, train journey was good. About 3.5 hours and we arrived in Hua Hin about 1130 and straight to the hotel. Nice big room at hotel & clean. Mainly full of Thai folk but that's ok. Went for a walk along the beach, it was bloody hot so decided to dip our feet in the water to cool doon. Omigod. The water was absolutely roasting as well, just like a hot bath. I have never seen it as hot as that, neither has Andy. So not much chance to get cool on the beach. Was 41 degrees lunch time yesterday - hot, hot, hot.

Ventured into town and had a wee scoot aroon 'n aboot to try and get our bearings. Much quieter than Bangkok and laid back. Nice place to chill out for a few days before we hit Vietnam. I think lazy days on the beach will be on the agenda.

Early night for us. Watched a bit of The Flint Stones and The Beatles (a hard days night). We never knew Fred & Wilma and the Beatles could speak Thai - you learn something new every day. :-)

Day 2 Bangkok

Woke up this moring and thought we were in Tarves - grey skies and horizontal rain. BUT on the bright side we made it down for breakfast for the first time ever on holiday. Andy even had the Thai breakfast (steam rice, chicken & broth), he's getting into the swing of things pretty quickly. Went for a walk in the pouring rain then decided to do the tourist thing. Went to the train station, got our train ticket for tomorrow morning (daft o'clock) to Hua Hin then gave the Tuk Tuk drivers a final chance to redeem themselves after last nights debacle and took one to the Golden Mountain (a big temple). It was pretty cool until I realised how high we had climbed to the top and I took a bit of a head wobble, nae good. Also had to try and find my flip flops after taking them off, nae easy when there are about a million other pairs lying aboot as you can see in the photo!! Got the buggers though. Spectacular view across Bangkok from the top, was well worth the climb. As the last tuk tuk driver did good we got another one to Khao San Road (backpacker alley) where Andy managed to procure a shiny new United Nations driving licence - for a small fee. We had to wait an hour or so for it to be 'made' so had to sit and people watch over a couple of Tiger beers - again. And it's good place to watch - all sorts of shapes, sizes & colours. Could have sat there all day but decided to be sensible and head home in a Tuk Tuk. We bartered him down from 300 baht to 200 baht but he gave Andy the tuk tuk drive of his stay so far (kamikaze driver) so decided to tip him 40 baht. What's the point in bartering?
Anyways, been for a last couple of Tiger's at Nana Plaza and decided to give the tuk tuk chaps a last chance before we leave the big smoke in the morning. It jist gets better, this was andy's ride of his LIFE. So much so we agreed 200 baht and gave him 300 baht for his stupendous efforts in getting us home rally styleeee...so here we are now ready to pack our bags and head south in the morning. It's been good. Last post from Bangkok, Speak to you from the beach in Hua Hin 2moro. x

Finally got to the real day No 1 in Bangkok

No worries, got picked up & taken to Bangkok Loft Hotel - nice. Absolutely jet lagged but had to soldier on. Nice lady with limited english suggested we go see a wat (temple) and sent us packing in a Joe Maxi. How cool until we realised there was a breakdown in doric / thai comms and she sent us to a mall instead - easy mistake. So we bailed out and went to Nana Plaza, sat and people/hooker/ladyboy watched for a while sinking a couple of well deserved tiger beers along the way. Decided to ask a nice Tuk Tuk man for a lift home, nae bother. Well, until we recognised lines of police vans, walls of car tyres impaled with sharpened bamboo and hundreds of metres of barbed wire. Hmmmm....looked familiar. Oh aye, it was on the bloody news in Singapore this morning, the Reed Jackets and their demos. How the hell did we end up here? I thought it was strange I offered him 200 baht and he agreed 150 baht, good deal!! Not. We were deployed into the middle of a war zone and told to make the rest of our way back on the sky train which was no more because of the violence surrounding us. Fit fine, could only happen to us. Anyway, took the opportunity to get a few pics of the army and plods before we could get shot and put another dampner on the holiday. Place was empty of tourists apart from us (strange) so we decided to get the nike's oot & leg it. All around were news and camera crews, no Joe Maxis and we seemed to be the only folks there with flip flops & no flak jacket. Anyway, finally frantically flagged one down outside the danger zone and got out alive and amazingly back to our hotel. The receptionist with the shit doric almost fainted when we told her what had happened - she spent the whole morning trying to tell us in her best doric not to go near the place - mai pen rai (never mind in Thai). We're still here to tell the the tale and we've got the pics to prove it. If you see a couple of white people on CNN or Sky News runnin'.......it wisnae us. :-))

Looking forward to what Day 2 is going to bring us. Keep you posted, or just tune into Sky News!!

Day 2

Tarves.

Day 1

Still in Tarves, Iceland really beginning to piss me off now, Hope it melts !!!

setting up new blog